Thursday, August 20, 2015

Its Raining but All I Feel Is the Warmth of My Sun

Woke up to this video and text
Today marks a year since I ventured out to meet a man I met online. I had been on dozens of dates that year and honestly, I didnt think much would actually pan out of this meeting. I wasn't even going to show up. I almost didnt. It was raining. I was tired. I didnt even remember what the guy even looked like, but I went to meet him anyway without asking for a pic because I didnt want him thinking I had a whole bunch of guys contacting me, and I had problems keeping track.

The reason I went to meet him despite not fully remembering him was because I rarely gave out my number on the dating site. So I figured if I gave him my number, I must have liked what I read in his profile and found him attractive.

Anyway, who would have thought that a true connection could happen from meeting online? Yes, I know people DO meet online and end up married, but did I really believe it would happen for me? I guess a part of me did. But things had gotten to be so up and down online, that it kind of became a game to me. Dating online became a way to get out the house and get a free meal every Friday.

Dating online became a way to kill time and help myself adjust to living alone. (Since my teenage son moved with his dad.)

I began to actually enjoy dating and took pressure off myself to make a "love connection". I started to really try to get to know a guy and not create any expectations.

Of course things turned out much differently with James. I will never forget the moment I laid eyes on him. I thought he was one of the most handsome men I had ever seen. (I still do) Still kicking myself now for making him wait an hour before coming out. Can hardly believe I almost didnt show up! WOW. Imagine my life this past year without meeting James... I would probably still be going out on dates just for fun, and probably dealing with bullcrap from guys with intimacy issues, or emotional baggage.

Accepting James for who he is was difficult at first because I thought he was too good to be true. Glad I was wrong, and glad I took a chance meeting him.

Tonight we will most likely go back to Mick's and commemorate our anniversary with dinner and then catch a late movie. I'll shoot a Periscope too (@soulntuition or @J_Shaahn). Probably will post a Youtube vid too.

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Guess what? It's raining today... I'm smiling. Im his Moon and he is my Sun. We fit together just like THAT.

Happy Anniversary James. I see many more to come.

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